Day 7

Week 1 is complete!  Yay!

This has been a great week.  Today was so full of sleeping and resting and resting and sleeping.  It was beautiful and sunny out and I just allowed myself to enjoy it from the comfort of my living room.  I did go for a walk though and communed with the Divine, and that was wonderful.

Things today that were great:  Waking up, brushing my teeth and drinking water, doing my morning blissipline, downloading "Down in the River To Pray" and singing it all morning, making myself a delicious smoothie and a cup of peppermint tea, reading Watch Where You Point That Thing and feeling into it, relaxing so much that I just had to lie down, going right back to sleep and konking out for a few hours, waking up again and feeling, listening to music and sitting on my Throne and enjoying my sunshine-filled living room, eating hot cross buns (cold) and talking with my mom on the phone for a while, reading the Divine Openings website, going for a walk with The Presence while Ollie hung out with my neighbor, enjoying the spring air (just leggings and a sweatshirt!), sitting in the dry part of the river bed and talking to God, witnessing the buds on the trees (eeeeeee!), watching the ducks on the water and feeling the breath of spring on my face and in my lungs, walking on and feeling good about my life and my Connection, tidying up my apartment, meeting with my new future roommate (and friend and fellow actress!), having a lovely time drinking tea and eating dinner and ice cream and watching Adventure Time!, laughing at the pure and innocent hilarity that is Adventure Time!, feeling ready for sleepy times and saying good night, washing dishes and cleaning up my kitchen while talking through my feelings with my Presence, going within and journaling about my intention to connect more deeply with humans, getting an email from an estranged friend and deciding to release old hurts and re-connect (interesting timing, eh?), feeling lighter and more Connected after feeling through old pain and fear, relaxing into my now and raving appreciation about what I have and where I am and how Connected I've become.

This is all so perfectly orchestrated.  I'm so glad I've been able to take the time to rest, to integrate, to move energy.  I'm getting better and better at all of this!  It's so great!  So exciting!  How quickly things manifest nowadays!

Love,
Adrienne

Day 6

Today was wonderfully simple.  So much energy moved and it felt great.  I'm getting better and better at relaxing on a deep, cellular level, and getting more and more out of the way.  By the end of the day I had moved from deep depression into euphoric excitement!

Things today that were great:  Waking up and doing my wake-up routine (ending on a high note with "Son Of A Preacher Man"!), eating a yummy breakfast of kielbasa and eggs and potatoes (mmmm, greasy fatty goodness), going back to bed and really just feeling my body, deeply feeling depression and fatigue all the way down to my bones, sleeping for hours while my dog watched over me, waking up and lounging in blankness for a while, feeling suddenly spurred to life again and ready to get things done, reading Divine Openings stuff and sinking into pleasure and blissful relaxation, drinking a milkshake made with peanutbutter-swirl ice cream and Rockin' Wellness (whoa, intense chocolatey sweetness....), walking to the grocery store to get Ollie's prescription, finding out that the prescription would only be $4 plus tax (holy shit!  If I'd gotten it at the vet's office it would have been literally 10x that much!), getting all the food and toilet items I needed (perfectly within my budget too, no calculator needed!), walking home with everything and enjoying the warmth of springtime, getting home and immediately warming up a hot cross bun, buttering it up and wolfing it down, following it with another one (cold this time, just as good!), reading more Divine Openings stuff, washing the dishes, giving Ollie a bath in the sink, giving him a nice treat to chew on, more relaxation and music-listening, dancing in my room and grinning at myself in the mirror, feeling uplifted and excited for my life, walking Ollie downtown and back, glimpsing my crush, speed-walking home and feeling light and free, immediately going out for a run, sprinting like a motherfucker on the last block, catching my breath and feeling the bursts of euphoria bubbling to the surface, quick stretch and lie-down on my yoga mat, raving for 15 minutes about how wonderful my life is and how awake I've become, browsing things on Youtube that I find interesting (hypnotists making girls orgasm on stage is pretty entertaining... learning about raw foods... watching a stand-up comedy bit from a Scottish physiotherapist talking about preventing incontinence by doing kegels), getting sleepy and ready for beddy-bye with my cuddle bear!

I have such a good life!  I've gotten out of the way so much in my life and my body is finally waking up and lightening up and responding to the Divine!  It's so wonderful to feel inspired to run and then go running, rather than feeling like "I should go run" and then forcing myself to do it.  It's wonderful to feel so energized and opened!  I'm so thankful to myself for diving in so deeply into that feeling of depression.  How quickly and easily it moved!  Thank God!  I love Divine Openings!  I love diving in! I love tipping the nose up and soaring on the wings of Grace!

Love,
Adrienne

Day 5

Came very close to not completing my challenge today, but I decided it feels better to just do it than to give up on it and be lazy.

Tonight's rave was very gently whispered to the darkness of my bedroom.  I'm feeling the need to just go very deeply into softness.  I've been fighting this and trying to push forward into action mode, but my body is not ready yet and I'm not there yet either.  It's a strong habit, but it's still just a habit.  I can create a new one, which I intend to do.  Softening is something I intend to practice more.

This morning's practice was gentle as well.  I prostrated for 10 minutes for my post-movement meditation, which is always nice.  I like prostrating, because I can always feel my back muscles relax more deeply than if I were sitting or lying on my back.

Things today that were great:  Waking up late but committing to my wake-up practice anyway, drinking water, brushing teeth and putting on a little bit of sweet makeup, doing my hair up and looking like a cute French girl, putting on my favorite tights-mini skirt-tank top combo, walking to work in my high-heeled boots, getting there and changing into my wonderful Aurora Shoes, setting out the desserts for display, writing the dessert board in cursive, getting some snacks from the co-op, drinking a little bit of coffee to alleviate the menstrual headache (oh yeah, getting my period this morning and successfully putting in my Diva Cup -- No leaks today!  Yeah!), drinking water, someone finding a hair on their Sacher Torte (oops, probably mine!) and taking it back and getting to eat it!!!, good interactions with my boss and co-workers, encountering an old friend and recommending Divine Openings to him after he remarked on how relaxed and beautiful I looked (and how he was wishing for more ease in his life), up-selling our grilled-cheese and tomato soup special to him and getting him to have some lunch, getting to eat a delicious meal with my Cafe family (grilled cheese special, but open-faced, with tomato soup and a little bit of the omelette filling of the day.... smoked trout with other delights.  YUM!), listening to Franz Ferdinand while cleaning up, making $12 in tips, getting to take home some delicious and perfectly cooked rosemary-garlic roasted red-skinned potatoes, walking home in the rain, getting home and cuddling with Ollie, taking Ollie to the vet (wearing my badass Blundstone boots this time as we walked through the pouring rain), a pleasant and informative vet visit (Ollie had a tick, tested positive for Lyme disease.  Good thing I caught it quickly, because we're able to get him on antibiotics and nip it in the bud!  Thank goodness!), getting home and taking a nap, neighbor picking up Ollie for play time, continuing to sleep, waking up and listening to some Divine Openings audios, reading the Level 1 Module 7 text, eating eggs with potatoes and kielbasa (so good, I wolfed it down), sitting with Ollie and browsing the interwebz and researching acting schools, eating chocolate ice cream with peanut butter swirl, feeling sleepy, writing down all the things that are weighing on my mind, listening to Donna's soothing voice in our recorded coaching session, lying down and softening, gently raving to myself out loud, taking score on the energy I moved today in the wake of contrast.

I'm giving myself so much credit today.  I really took the bull by the horns and moved some amazing energy.  I blasted right up the scale and now I'm choosing to soften and ease into sleep.  Tomorrow I intend to be with the Divine as much as possible throughout the day.  Just listening to audios and reading DO material and being in the silence.  At some point I can do laundry, and I do need to pick up a couple of things from the grocery store (fill out Ollie's prescription, get toilet paper, milk and bananas, etc), but for the rest of the time I intend to go within and be silent and rest.  No looking for things, no making things happen, no buying things or searching or grasping.  Just going within, going within, going within.  Raving, raving, raving.  Communing, communing, communing.

Love,
Adrienne

Day 4

Today's practices were slow and gentle.  I had a very contrasty day today.  I'm moving energy and being where I am at the same time.  I'm actually getting better and better at all of this.  I am where I am, and it's actually pretty brilliant.

Things today that were great:  Committing to my morning wake-up practice above all else (including breakfast, etc... woke up late!), walking to work in the sunshiney morning, arriving and putting on my sweet Mary Jane's over my stripey colorful socks, buying myself a coconut water and some snacks, drinking coconut water and nibbling on my snacks (yum yum), beginning the work of hosting, starting out strong, making accurate predictions 90% of the time and having mostly satisfied customers, keeping my head about me as much as I could, eating a delicious salad for lunch (with a yummy basil-parmesan dressing), fun conversations at lunch, making $55 in tips, walking home and being warm (! too warm for the coat I was wearing!!), getting home and venting a little to my neighbor but deciding to shift my energy to my own private quarters (he took care of Ollie for the night), crying in my bed (what a relief), taking a nap for an hour or so, waking up and getting ready to go to the movies with my dad, watching The Grand Budapest Hotel (oh my god, so brilliant!  I ADORE WES ANDERSON.), walking with dad down to one of my favorite shwanky restaurants and eating a delicious piece of vegan chocolate torte (mmmmmmmmm, mouthgasm every time), having wonderful conversations with him, encountering my favorite actor friends, oggling a cute boy I've had my eye on for a few weeks, sending him a note via a friend of mine who works there as well ("have dinner with me" with my number and name... simple, but I did it), going home and having more conversations with dad in my lovely round living room, sitting in silence for a long while, listening to a Diving In audio from Lola, browsing Craigslist and dreaming of where I'll go and what I'll do next, prostrating in my room and feeling the weight of things lift off, accepting where I am in my life and allowing myself to be here, raving gently and genuinely for 15 minutes, drinking water, getting ready for beddy bye.

Everything is gonna be alright.  I'm moving through my experience exactly the way I'm supposed to.  Nothing has gone wrong, and I haven't fucked anything up just because I'm feeling a low vibration.  It's all good information, and it's all energy just moving through me.  I'm choosing to release resistance as much as I can.  God is doing the rest.  I'm not required to be perfect at any of this.

Love,
Adrienne

Day 3

Aaah, such a delight to bask in high vibrations!

This morning I woke up later than I'd wanted, but I still did my little morning routine and I enjoyed it thoroughly.  I love moving my body and feeling the muscles and bones and tendons all moving in sync and perfect coordination.

Things today that were great:  Waking up and doing my morning routine, really rockin' out to "Happy" which is still my favorite joy-prep song, remembering the dance contest on the Bonnaroo website and intending to send in a video submission, rinsing my body off and getting dressed, walking down to the pastry shop to meet with the photographer guy I'll be working with this spring, buying and eating two motherfuckin' delicious chocolate-filled croissants and enjoying the shit out of them with a cup of decaf coffee (mmmmmm, such a good combo), talking all things art and philosophy of life to the photographer dude, getting a ride from him to the Farmer's Market, wandering through and then making my way home via a footpath by the river, walking all the way home using this back route that I'd never explored before (super enjoyable, especially with my badass boots!  So much mud and rough terrain!  I feel like I can conquer anything!), getting mud on my boots and enjoying the sight of it drying on the waterproofed leather, getting home and hangin' out with Ollie Bear, making a delicious lunch of quinoa/brown rice/kidney beans + egg + sauteed spinach + hot sauce, watching hours and hours of Dexter (finished Season 6... holy shit... just HAD to start up Season 7, which is cool but much less exciting than I expected), pausing during Golden Hour and walking Ollie down to the river, hanging out on a dried up part of the river bed and asking for clarity on my next life move, watching ducks and clouds and the river moving along at the speed of Life, enjoying the sight of buttery golden sunlight on the surface of the water, walking around and finding that clarity I'd asked for and reveling in it, running the last two blocks home (it feels so good to run!  I'm gonna do more of that), cracking open the 7th season of Dexter upon arrival home, pausing to go and buy spaghetti sauce and ice cream, making myself some delicious dinner (spaghetti with smoked sausage and tomato sauce... just like when I was a kid!  Yum!), filling up on spaghetti and then eating some ice cream (after first snagging some Reese's cups from the gas station next door... I always forget that "peanut butter swirl" ice cream doesn't actually have peanut butter cups in it, even though it has one on the front of the box!  I kept having a nagging feeling to pick some up while I was at the store getting the ice cream, but I was like "there will already be some in the ice cream!"  Haha, I should ALWAYS trust my instincts!).  Enjoying my ice cream and Reese's cups, watching more and more Dexter, getting tired of Dexter and browsing Craigslist, finally closing my laptop and my eyes and sinking into a truly blissful state of satisfaction and enjoyment of just my inner world, enjoying the vibrational sensations of the Divine, just allowing all the energy within me to exist and move and vibrate as it is, genuinely being at peace with what I'm currently vibrating and what I've already created, knowing that more is coming and it's all gonna be fucking awesome.  Raving for 15 minutes and just finding myself fascinated with the experience of being in a body.  Enjoying my hands and legs and hips as they move through space and time.  Feeling that my period is about to arrive and reveling in the knowledge that my sugar cravings are probably related to that.  Releasing resistance to myself and the eating habits I've been indulging in for the last week or so.  Enjoying my body the way it is and reveling in how amazing it is as a creature/machine/system that I get to inhabit and interact with every day.  Intending to become more and more deeply in touch with my body on an intimate, cellular, fine-tuned level.  Drinking water and enjoying the clear, clean taste of such a powerful liquid.  Feeling ready to drift off into sleepy-time land, satisfied and happy.

Love,
Adrienne

Day 2

WOW.

I cannot describe how amazing I felt today!  This non-habitual movement thing is really amazing!  I got up and did my 5 minute rave and then 10 minutes of movement, and man!  My body was getting really warm!  I had so much fun dancing and moving and squirming around in my room!  It was a really great way to begin the day.  After that I lay down for 10 minutes and felt my body and did my best to focus on my breathing.

For the rest of the day though, I just rode on this high that was so easy to maintain!  So strong and sturdy I felt in this vibration!  It's truly amazing how quickly I can now snap back into my high, even if I get kicked off course for a week.  It's like I never stopped raving!  I just picked up where I left off and soared up even higher for it!  Thanks, Contrast!

Things today that were great:  Waking up and lounging in bed for a long while, discovering that it was much earlier in the day than I'd thought, browsing through instagram for a little bit (oops, broke the rules... supposed to do that after my morning ritual!  Oh well, next time), raving and then moving, dancing to Phish ("Light" which is one of my favorite songs of theirs, from their newest album), breathing, noticing myself getting antsy but staying with the meditation until the timer chimed, taking a shower (dancing made me sticky!  Wow!), appreciating my body so much, eating a delicious breakfast (same as yesterday:  Rockin Wellness and peanut butter mixed into my granola, topped with almond milk... I'll probably do the same tomorrow, it's really good!), heading out to the bank and chatting with my mom on the phone, going on a mission to find a chocolate-filled croissant (first place was out, so I went back the way I came and got some from the local bakery!  It was the last one!), sitting in the window with my croissant and coffee and watching the rain begin, talking with my mom about her latest developments and mine, hanging up and enjoying my coffee while reading the financial section of a newspaper someone had left behind at my table (getting excited about becoming financially savvy!), writing in my journal about how amazing I was feeling, walking home in the rain and not minding (because my Blundstones are waterproof, motherfuckers!), getting home and snuggling Ollie, sitting in my chair and reading the Divine Openings forum, listening to some audios from Lola Jones while I washed dishes, making myself a baller-ass lunch (mixed greens and baby spinach, dressed with a special aioli-type dressing I whipped up, topped with red quinoa/brown rice/kidney beans, and crowned with two fried eggs over easy.  BAM!  Delicious and nutritious), sitting down to read Watch Where You Point That Thing and getting distracted (I don't think it's time yet to read that book, although I am excited for it), making a little rave on the Forum, hopping down to the gas station to buy some Moosetrax ice cream (classic!), eating the entire pint and binge-watching Dexter Season 6 for about 7 hours (whoa), admiring the awesome performances and dramas in that show, getting excited about being an actress, subscribing to Backstage Online (about fuckin' time!  Teehee), browsing casting call listings, daydreaming about the next things I'll be doing as an actress.  Feeling excitement tingle through my whole body and being throughout the day.  Raving the shit out of my life for 15 minutes and not wanting to ever stop!  Admiring the beautiful living room I get to sit in every day!  Basking in the sunlight that pours through my windows for all of the hours that the sun is up (south facing windows are the best!). Feeling bubbly and cute in my sweet haircut!  God, the list could just go on and on.

Tomorrow I'm meeting with a photographer to discuss a potential upcoming photo shoot.  My face and modeling expertise in exchange for headshots from him!  Sweet deal!  I checked out his work (mostly wedding photography) and it's really good.  I like it a lot, and I'm looking forward to working with him and having some new photographs to show to casting directors and such.  And I'm also very much looking forward to eating another chocolate-filled croissant (or two) tomorrow with a cup of delicious coffee!!  It's kind of all I can think about since I had that one on Wednesday... God, what a mouthgasm.  How do they make food so good?  I've been enjoying food so much more since I decided to stop worrying about gaining or losing weight, or eating the wrong kind of food.  I'm just enjoying what I'm eating and I'm loving my body no matter what.  And it's great!  I feel my body energizing and livening up!  I'm no longer fighting myself or my body or my cravings or my desires.  I'm just enjoying all of it.

Loving this.  This life is amazing, and I'm creating it every step of the way!  HOW FUCKING COOL IS THAT?!?!?!?!

Love,
Adrienne

PS:  Oh yeah, and an upgrade happened on my computer!  For several months now, I hadn't been able to see the home page of Divine Openings, so I would always have to go to one of the branching-off pages (like the forum, or the first aid pages), but today I discovered that it fixed itself!  Yay!  I can see the whole Divine Openings page!!!  How lovely!  Now I can make it my homepage again.

Day 1: New Challenge

So I set down the whole "challenge" thing for a week.  And boy, did I feel a decline in my vibration!  But the good thing is, it got so intolerable to be lower than where I had been only a week ago, that I found it in me to re-commit to a brand new, vibration-raising, 30 Day Challenge!

In the morning: 5 minutes of raving, followed by 10 minutes of non-habitual movement, followed by 10 minutes of pleasure-breathing and body-feeling meditation.  These times are longer than the ones I did this morning, because I decided I wanted to have more raving and more pleasure-breathing time.  But today I did 3 minutes of raving and 7 minutes of breathing (so it was a 20 minute practice altogether).  Tomorrow I'll be doing the longer times, but I'll still count this as Day 1.  I'm also going to end each day with a 15 minute rave and a typed-out re-cap of all the awesomeness in my day!

So!  Things today that were great!  Waking up early (even earlier than my early alarm!) and taking Ollie outside while drinking a nice big jar of fresh clean water, doing my morning practice (it was nice to move my body and wake it up like that!), eating breakfast (granola with peanut butter and Rockin' Wellness mixed in, topped with some almond milk!  YUM!  Reminded me of Reese's Puffs!), getting ready for work and walking there with mah snazzy shades on in the beautiful spring sunshine, gentle clouds of breath preceding me, listening to "Happy" on the way and feeling uplifted, feeling the springtime breathing the Earth alive (EEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!), getting to work a good 20 minutes early and easing my way into my work day, slicing meat and listening to Die Antwoord, having a pretty busy morning, snagging up an entire freshly baked croissant that someone had meant to take home but forgot at their table (OMG, topped with melted chocolate!  ORGASM!), eating said croissant with chocolatey goodness while writing the specials on the boards (I love doing that task!  I really enjoy my handwriting!), doing the best I could and making my way through the day, having kind and generous customers (Made $123 in tips today!  And I just noticed that alignment of numbers!  Sweet!), getting a hug from my friend, eating a delicious Caesar Plate (one of my favorite things on our menu.... a stack of sourdough, mayo, lettuce, tomato, local smoked ham, asiago, and a fried egg, with our house-made Caesar vinaigrette!  So simple yet SO GOOD!), getting to eat the last tiramisu (we were meant to share it, but nobody seemed to be interested, so I got to eat like 3/4 of it!  I'M NOT COMPLAINING!!), listening to the Gorillaz while cleaning up, feeling my feelings the best I could, walking home, doing a little bit of raving when I got home so I could tip the nose up, taking a tiny nap, heading over to the bank to get my taxes filed for free (SO THANKFUL for this wonderful service they provide each year!  I found out I'll be receiving a total of $808 from my return!  FUCKING AWESOME!), walking home and listening to the Presence make poop jokes in the back of my awareness while I frustratedly plunged the shit out of my toilet (haha, see?  Puns are so great), giving up and going outside to tell my neighbor (and handyman) that my toilet wouldn't flush, his friend hi-tailing it into my apartment to fix the situation, now having a toilet that flushes perfectly (yay!  Men are great!), washing my hands repeatedly with the amazing new sage-scented soap I got by Pre de Provence (AMAZING soaps and lotions.  I'm a HUGE FAN), coating my skin with their amazing "Luxe Butter" lotion (French Lavender is the most orgasmic scent of all time), walking down to the soul food restaurant down the block from me and ordering a bowl of their amazing Corn and Crab Chowder (my favorite!), wolfing down my chowder and cornbread (so good... buttered with delicious whipped sweet cream butter), heading home and browsing sex toys online, jerking off in the shower, more Luxe Butter, lying down about to go to sleep but deciding that I needed to finish my commitment (nighttime rave and re-cap!  Gotta happen!), raving for 15 minutes and instantly feeling my vibration raising as I noted all the amazing things I have and that have manifested recently and that are manifesting right in front of my eyes (!!!), eating some leftover quinoa and brown rice with red beans and a fried egg and some kim chee (yum, good combo!  I love kim chee), brushing and flossing my awesome teeth, more Luxe Butter (god I love this stuff, I'm so glad I bought it!), sitting down to write this and feeling satisfied that I have kept a vibration-raising commitment to myself.  Looking forward to drifting off to sleep while listening to Donna's soothing voice coaching my sweet past self!

I love feeling the instant relief of tipping the nose up!  I am so happily addicted to raving!  I was really going through some withdrawals there for a minute!  ;)  Such a good thing to practice regularly, and I'm glad I'm now taking it to a new level by adding in some non-habitual movement and pleasure-breathing/ body-feeling meditation upon first awakening (I'm deciding that that's a rule of the challenge:  Aside from peeing, drinking water, and letting Ollie out, the 25 minute morning practice must be done first thing upon awakening!).

THANK YOU UNIVERSE/GOD/LARGE SELF/ME!

Love,
Adrienne